We watched the first half of Attack of the Clones. Is Obiwan a political conspiracy theorist? Does Obiwan have a drinking problem? Is Obiwan a flat-Earther? Why are we picking on Obiwan? Take a deathstick break, and find out what parts of the movie made us laugh, cry, or squirm as we travel from the mean streets of Coruscant, to the stormy seas of El Kamino, to the [gulp] meadows of Naboo.